Sunday, January 9, 2011

love dare. Day one

I want to start this challenge with a few things to let you know how I am going to do each days dare. I will, on the night before each challenge, post the next days dare. So, todays dare was posted Sunday night. My motivation is to be done by, on, or near February 14, Valentines day. Even if you don't start on day 1, please feel free to join the dare at any time. Also, if you want to share how you are doing please do so in the comments as everyone can benefit and we can encourage each other as we go! DAY 1
If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift if prophecy, and know all the mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.
And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.....1 Corinthians 13:1-3
Love is patient
Today is the first day of the Love Dare challenge. As we follow the book written by Stephen and Alex Kendrick we must acknowledge that we cannot do this on our own accord..but with the help of the Holy Spirit we are able to see ourselves as we are..sinners in need of grace. That is why patience is a perfect place to start...
Love will inspire you to become a patient person because you desire to be loved. We all do. It motivates us to go against our selfishness and be selfless. "Love always does what is best for others and can empower us to face the greatest of problems. When you choose to be patient, you respond in a positive way to a negative situation. You are slow to anger. You choose to have a long fuse instead of a short temper.Rather than being restless and demanding, love helps you to settle down and begin to show mercy to those around you. It is a choice to command your emotions rather than allowing your emotions to control you. Anger is usually caused when a strong desire for something is mixed with disappointment or grief. It is often and emotional reaction that flows out of our own selfishness, foolish or evil motives. (ouch. right?)
Patience, however, makes us wise. It doesn't rush to judgement but LISTENS to what the other person is saying. I like how the authors put it here: Patience stands at the doorway where anger is clawing to burst in, but waits to see the whole picture before passing judgement. Patience allows your spouse to be human. It understands that everyone fails. When a mistake is made, it chooses to give them more time than they deserve to correct it." I want to say here as a note that sometimes patience is letting go of your spouse and letting God do the work that is needed..some things take the power of God to fix and we can get in the way..being patient while the Lord takes over can be the challenge.. just to let go and let God!
So, moving on.."What would the tone and volume of your home be like if you tried this biblical approach: "See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another" 1 Thessalonians 5:15
"Few do patience well, and none of us do it naturally. But wise men and women will pursue it as an essential ingredient to their marriage relationship. That is a good starting point to demonstrate true love."
Today's dare
The first part of this dare is fairly simple. Although love is communicated in a number of ways, our words often reflect the condition of our heart. For the next day, resolve to say nothing negative to your spouse at all. If the temptation arises, choose not to say anything. It's better to hold your tongue than to say something you will regret.
When you have completed today's dare reflect on these questions:
  • Did anything happen today to cause anger towards your mate?
  • Were you tempted to think disapproving thoughts and let them come out in words?

Ok. The first step is always the bravest I say..I wish you the best as you take today's challenge..please share with us if you can how you did and what you learned..we can really encourage each as we take each day at a time..Thanks for stopping by! love ya mean it! Stephanie



Julie said...

And....Awaaaaaay We Go! Ready to start...Having a Long Distance relationship with my Hubby for the present might call on me to be a little creative at times, but that's okay! (new job in another state 15 hours away) I am excited to be attempting this for the first time. The movie was outstanding.

Dianna said...

Just a note, Stephanie, to let you know that it is onward we go here in this household! I'm so excited! Being positive isn't always my nature...I'm excited to see how today's challenge changes my outlook!

Kolein said...

Thank you Stephanie for doing this! I LOVE this!

I'm up for the challenge, cuz there will be days that LOVE will be a challenge to express...not today. We're both feeling kinda giddy!!

I chose today to see my husband as my helpmate and to allow him space to be that for me. I did not allow anger to enter in to any part of my thoughts about him. He's home with us all day long most expressing love can be hard when a mom, Me, is home schooling and busy with domestic chores. But it was a day of love and giving here.

Happy New Year!

Dianna said...

Hey Stephanie,
Just checking in to say that today has been a very positive day here with us! I have to say that there was once this evening that I found negativity pushing hard on my lips, but the Holy Spirit is faithful to remind me! Amazing how quickly negativity can become positive when caught at the right time.